As I stood in the bathroom taking test after test, my heart was pounding out of my chest so loudly I couldn't focus. A moment I will never forget with so many thoughts running through my mind. I felt numb. Nothing can prepare you for a moment like this. Being pregnant at seventeen was not on my to do list. However, it has played a huge role in who I am today.
I spent nine months wrestling with every single thought and decision, but I wish I would've given myself a little more grace.
I was just a baby at seventeen years old and making these kinds of big life choices at such a young age was hard.
Everyone's experience and situation differs and that's a part of what makes adoption so beautiful.
On November 26, 2010 I gave birth to a very precious baby boy. I chose to place him for adoption and fourteen years later, I do not regret my choice.
Do I still miss him? Yes.
Was it hard? Yes.
Do I wonder where he is and what he is doing? Yes.
Adoption is a lifelong journey open or closed. There is not one day that will go by where they don't cross your mind.
Adoption is the most BRAVE LOVE. A journey many of us are on. And although each journey is different, we are all here to support each other and share our experiences in hopes to help one another.
You can read more about Jillian’s adoption journey by reading her memoir - Fearless: Having the courage it takes to stand face to face with your fears
